Monday, September 11, 2023

WtAFW: Stuffed by Sylvia Morrow


We thought that pillow-related sex shenanigans peaked in that scene in BREAKING DAWN when Edward bites a pillow during post-marital sex. We thought wrong.

Because this author thought, "Wouldn't it be neat if I wrote about a sentient waifu pillow who could suck the life out of people like that chalice in Last Crusade?"

And then she wrote this book and did exactly that.

STUFFED is like the pillow version of UNHINGED, aka the romance where the woman has sex with the front door of her apartment. The plot thickens when you get to the afterword of this book and find out that she's buddies with that author, Vera Valentine. I'm not entirely unconvinced that the two of them aren't in cahoots to write an entire catalogue of horny IKEA furniture.

Anne doesn't like to be touched. She has something called fictophilia, which is only being attracted to cartoons/fake people. And her ideal way of getting off is by watching anime and humping her pillow. Her pillow which, unbeknownst to her, is stuffed with a phoenix feather in between all that down, and has been given life from her... happy juice. That's right. What you read right there? Drink it in. That's what the pillow does.

Anne, despite being a weeb of the finest order, who quaffs ramune the way others might appreciate a fine wine, and has a fictional crush on Black Butler, can't get away from creeps. Despite the thick glasses she wears and the makeup she definitely doesn't, dudes canNOT get enough. Especially not her creepy landlord, who barges into her apartment and heads right to her bed, to see where "the magic happens." BRB, throwing up in the back of my mouth.

That's when it's pillow's time to shine. And once he announces himself, it doesn't take Anne long to see the possibilities. And she does have all of those copic markers just casually sitting around. What better way to give her pillow a glow-up before she fucks it?

No matter how prepared you think you will be going into this book, you will not be prepared. I watched a TikTok review of this book that spoiled basically everything, and I. Still. Was. Not. Prepared.

I'm sorry to say I didn't like this book at all. I thought it was creepy and the sex scenes were ick. Anne was just such an uncanny valley representation of one of those anime-obsessed girls you meet at cons, and I think the fact that I've met people like this just makes it even weirder reading this book.

I will say this, though. I thought it was sweet that the author gave some of her writer buds shout-outs in the back of the book and credited her illustrators.

1 out of 5 stars

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